sarc.

My dad told me when I was 14 years old that I should stick to what I was good at. And I have. I'm good at writing what I think. Saying what I feel. Loving with all my heart. Trusting those who don't deserve it. And realizing my strengths are more often than not the source of someone else's weakness. I'll love you forever, I'll like you for always, as long as I'm living- a source of ridiculousness I'll be.

I am on a diet for the rest of forever and I hate everyone. 
Whoever said that boiled cauliflower ran through a food processor would give the “illusion” of potatoes is A DAMNED LIAR and should come speak to me immediately about this malfeasance. And yes. It’s malfeasance because I said it is. 
I made dinner for my kids and weird fake potatoes for me at 3:30 because even though all my clocks changed themselves, the one on my oven didn’t. Times they are not a changin’ unless you do it manually on your stove apparently. 
Leslie Knope. Spirit Animal. Until the end of time. 

  • I am on a diet for the rest of forever and I hate everyone. 
  • Whoever said that boiled cauliflower ran through a food processor would give the “illusion” of potatoes is A DAMNED LIAR and should come speak to me immediately about this malfeasance. And yes. It’s malfeasance because I said it is. 
  • I made dinner for my kids and weird fake potatoes for me at 3:30 because even though all my clocks changed themselves, the one on my oven didn’t. Times they are not a changin’ unless you do it manually on your stove apparently. 
  • Leslie Knope. Spirit Animal. Until the end of time. 

(Source: parksandrecgifs)

6 months ago

  1. angelamaryclaire reblogged this from parksandrecgifs
  2. scothenderson reblogged this from parksandrecgifs
  3. tiarawannabes reblogged this from parksandrecgifs
  4. jrsavagehu4l reblogged this from slightlysilly
  5. slightlysilly reblogged this from parksandrecgifs and added:
    Typical Pawneean attitude.
  6. ruthakers reblogged this from parksandrecgifs and added:
    I am on a diet for the rest of forever and I hate everyone. Whoever said that boiled cauliflower ran through a food...
  7. saycoolagain reblogged this from parksandrecgifs
  8. alydiva reblogged this from parksandrecgifs
  9. wanderlust713 reblogged this from parksandrecgifs and added:
    why my diet fails after a day
  10. mortalityishypothetical reblogged this from parksandrecgifs
  11. notyourexpectations reblogged this from a-smack-of-ham and added:
    I almost never order a salad....think the few times I have, it was
  12. a-smack-of-ham reblogged this from parksandrecgifs and added:
    Me too. I really do.